Why I'm Not Catholic

This is my main reason for not being Catholic. No other explanation required. 

Police Lives Matter

Jesus Is Coming Soon

I'm Your Biggest Fan

Acyrologia

Teach Your Kids To Stand Up To Bullies

Coincidence?

I don't know if this is coincidence or if it's even real, but it's chilling just the same. I do know Islam is an AntiChrist religion because it denies the divinity of Jesus.  

Don't Underestimate Me

Introvert

Wal~Mart Transformer

The Sound Of Nature

Questions For The End Of The World

So the world is supposed to be ending on or around September 23, 2015. That's bad. I never have found out who let the dogs out, the way to get to Sesame Street, why Dora doesn't just use Google maps, why we don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery", why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed, why "abbreviated" is such a long word, why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish washing liquid is made with real lemons, why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections, why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Why do we park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? If a deaf person has to go to court is it still called a hearing? Does the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star have the same tune? Why did you just try to sing those two previous songs? And just what is Victoria's secret? You see, the world just has to keep going. I have too many questions......and do you really think I am this witty ????, because I actually stole this from a friend, who stole from a friend , who stole from a friend , who stole from for a friend , who stole from a friend ...which you may now steal from me.  

Profession As Relates To Pants Height

Science Test

My wife was grading a science test at home that she had given to her elementary-school class and was reading some of the results to me.

The subject was the human body, and the first question was: "Name one of the major functions of your skin."

One child wrote: "To keep people who look at you from throwing up."

Moth Man

A guy walks into a dentist's office and flops right down on the couch.

"Doc," he says, "here's the problem. I think I'm a moth."

"Well," says the dentist, "that certainly is a problem, but why did you come into a dentist's office?"

"The light was on."

Something To Think About

First they came for millions of our unborn babies, and His people did not fight the abortionists for fear of being called male chauvinist pigs, sexists, and oppressors.

Then they came to defile us sexually, and His people did not fight the sexual deviants for fear of being called homophobes.

Then they came for our national borders, and His people did not fight the illegal Mexicans and the Muslim infiltrators for fear of being called xenophobes, Islamophobes, and statists.

Then they came for our conservative Congress, and His people did not fight the RINOs and the communists for fear of being called uncooperative extremists.

Then they came for our Presidency, and His people did not fight Obama and his insurgents for fear of being called racists.

Then they came for our debt-free sovereign money, and His people did not fight the owners and employees of the Federal Reserve banking crime syndicate for fear of being called naive and unsophisticated.

Then they came for our churches, and His people did not fight the pacifist apostate pastors and priests spewing eunuch hermeneutics for fear of being called intolerant bigots.

Then they came for our military, and His people did not fight the sequestering political insurgents trying to disarm us for fear of being called war mongers and colonialists.

Then they came for our America, and His people did not fight because they were no longer Americans and there was no fight in them.

Then He came back for His people, but He did not know them -- so He left them.

(See Matthew 7:19-23, then Nehemiah 4:14.)

One Nation Under God

One Nation under God was their cry and declaration,
Upon the law of Nature's God they built a mighty Nation.
For unlike mankind before them who had walked this earthen sod,
These men would never question the Sovereignty of God.

That all men were "created" was a truth "self-evident,"
To secure the rights God gave us was the role of government.
And if any form of government became destructive of this end,
It was their right, indeed their duty, a new one to begin.

So with a firm reliance on Divine Providence for protection,
They pledged their sacred honor and sought His wise direction.
They lifted up an appeal to God for all the world to see,
And vowed their independence forever to be free.

I'm glad they're not here with us to see the mess we're in,
How we've given up our righteousness for a life of indulgent sin.
For when abortion isn't murder and sodomy is deemed a right,
Then evil is now called good and darkness is now called light.

While truth and law were founded on the God of all creation,
Man now, through law, denies the truth and calls it "separation."
No longer does man see a need for God when he's in full control,
For the only truth self-evident is in the latest poll.

But with man as his own master we fail to count the cost,
Our precious freedoms vanish and our liberty is lost.
Children are told they can't pray in school and they teach them evolution,
When will they see the fear of God is the only true solution?

Our schools have become a battleground while all across the land,
Christians shrug their shoulders afraid to take a stand.
And from the grave their voices cry, the victory has already been won.
Just glorify the Father as did His only Son.

And when your work on earth is done, and you've traveled where we've trod,
You'll leave the land we left to you, One Nation Under God!" 

By Judge Roy Moore

Trouble

If Jesus were to do his same ministry on earth today, He would be in trouble with:

the FDA for turning water into wine without a license,

the EPA for killing fig trees,

the AMA for practicing medicine without a license,

the Dept. of Health for asking people to open graves, for raising the dead and for feeding 5,000 people in the wilderness,

the NEA for teaching without a certificate,

OSHA for walking on water without a life-jacket and for flying without an airplane, 

the SPCA for driving hogs into the sea, 

and the National Board of Psychiatrists for giving advice on how to live a guilt-free life.

Going Fishing

Buy A Log Truck

Children Are Quick..........

Teacher: Why are you late?

Student: Class started before I got here.

Teacher: Glen, why do you get so dirty?

Glen: I'm a lot closed to the ground than you are.

Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

Simon: No sir, I don't have to; my mom is a good cook.

Teacher: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your 

brother's. Did you copy his?

Clyde: No, sir. It's the same dog. 

Teacher: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when 

people are no longer interested?

Harold: A teacher.

Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry

tree but also admitted it. Now, Louis, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

Louis: Because George still had the axe in his hand.